The Circle Of Life

I love puppies, who doesn’t? Maybe some hardened souls out there, some evil Wall Street hedge fund managers who only care about making billions off old widows pensions (okay, how did I digress into an anti-capitalist rant?) Back to puppies.

Puppies are worth all the trouble they create (usually). The only bad thing about having a dog in your life is that you’re probably going to outlive it. No parent should ever have to go through the death of their child, no doubt the worst thing that can happen to a person. With pets, though, so often we have to endure the agony of losing them. Not that I’m equating the loss of a child with saying goodbye to your animal, but still, losing that little critter who gets you through some of the worst days of your life, who makes the sunny days even brighter, who reminds you that no matter how badly you f&%k something up, you’re still the king - losing someone like that is its own kind of hell.

In my memoir I wrote about losing a Jack Russell Terrier named “Buster”; well, I have a little confession to make. “Buster” was actually not a JRT, nor was he just one dog. In the memoir, I morphed two dachshunds, “Buster” and “Rocky” into the one JRT “Buster.” (Don’t worry about “Rocky” the dachshund; he plays a prominent plot-changing role in “Code of Conduct.”) Losing Rocky and Buster in 2002 and 2003 was horrible. The timing couldn’t have been worse.

But life goes on and here we are in 2008. I think about those little guys all the time. So last month when our friend Bill got Twila and Tessie, I couldn’t wait to be “Uncle Rich” again to two dachshunds! I got to see them last night for the first time. What was… interesting… was that our friend Bill works in costumes at the Lion King. He brought the dogs to work so we got to see them backstage during the show.

I saw Lion King in LA years ago and what I recall most vividly from it is the song “Circle of Life” and that’s what the show is ultimately about. As I played with Twila and Tessie naturally I remember Rocky and Buster and as the Lion King played on the monitor over our heads, the puppies reminded me of the Circle of Life.

Loss has been an ever-frequent recurring theme in my life this decade and the last few weeks its come back, not as close to me personally as a few years ago, like losing one of my closest friends and then my dad in six months, but I know what friends are going through. Thinking about the Circle of Life doesn’t make death and loss any easier, really, but it acts as a reminder of why things are like they are. Death is nature’s way of renewing itself. Life may exist after death but we’re not here to think about that. As far as know for sure, this life is IT and we have to make the most of IT.

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TOUR NOTES:  (here’s the updated schedule)

Sat., May 10:  6:00PM -  New Orleans, LA
FAB Books

Tues., May 13: 3:00PM - Washington, DC
George Washington University, Marvin Center, 800 21st NW

Fri., June 13: 1:00PM - Boston, MA - Borders, Downtown Crossing Store

Wed., June 18: 7:30 - San Francisco , CA- A Different Light

Check back as I’m adding other stops on the West Coast.

Thanks to Robert of North Carolina for sending me these pictures from my recent visit to Raleigh. The pic with Robert and me is to the left, and my lifelong friend Dawn (aka from “Secrets” as Melanie), someone who has been with me on this “Cycle of Life.” And honestly don’t know how I’d make it without her.

 

 

 

Someone’s In The Kitchen With Chef Bobo! And Meet The LaSalle Brothers!

You find yourself on an island… who would you want with you?

One of the many advantages of living on the Isle of Manhattan is that I’m always meeting fellow islanders who’ve lived fascinating lives. It’s easy to meet people here, partly because we’re all sandwiched between two rivers and spend a lot of time bumping into each other (quite literally) on the sidewalks.

This blog is about two of those people I’ve met:  Chef Bobo and Jake LaSalle, half of the incredible team known as the “The LaSalle Brothers.” Both of these fine gentlemen make me smile and laugh and inspire me never to give up pursuing my passion. 

Last year Jonathan introduced me to Robert “Chef Bobo” Surles and we bonded instantly, partly because he’s a Chef from the South and brought pimento cheese to my 40th Birthday bash. It was love at first bite. Chef Bobo has a cook book, Chef Bobo’s Good Food Cookbook.  He’s the head chef at The Calhoun School, but don’t be fooled, grown-ups can eat healthy also and find many delicious recipes in this book.  Here’s a video, starring Chef Bobo:

 

One lesson that Chef Bobo also has to offer:  Don’t ever give up pursuing your passion.  As he reminded me yesterday, “I realized my passion for cooking over 15 years ago but didn’t really think I could do anything about it until 8 years ago after losing my safe corporate job.”  Sometimes blessings disquise themselves as tragedies.  I’m not sure why they do that, that’s one of the many questions I have for the Goddess. 

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Jake LaSalle is a true Renaissance man.  He and his identical twin brother have been performing for audiences most of their lives.  He’s an aspiring author; we met last month at Christopher Rice’s book reading.  A born networker with a great energy (and a degree from Columbia University), he’s a rising star in the world and it will be exciting to see where his journey takes him.  You will definitely want to check out The LaSalle Brothers website for a lot of great pictures and videos.  Seriously. 

ON THE PINK CARPET WITH LESLIE JORDAN

“Y’all, I’m the gayest person I know“

says Leslie Jordan.  “I fell outta my mama’s womb and right into her high heels.” 

So began a ninety-minute raucous romp down Leslie Jordan’s life on (and sometimes beneath) the pink carpet of fame, glory and wealth.  Someday he’s going to go back to the bully who tormented him in junior high volleyball (aka “Smear the Queer”) and thank him. “Because of you, I learned to be funny,” Leslie will tell his unsuspecting former tormenter in Chattanooga.  “And you can kiss my rich, gay ass!” 

If you haven’t heard of Leslie Jordan, the Taliban is recruiting and I think you should join because apparently you enjoy living in caves.  “Beverly Leslie” Jordan, of “Will & Grace” (”Well, well, Karen Walker.  I thought I smelled gin and regret.”)  hasn’t always enjoyed glitz and glamor.  In his 2005 show, ”Like A Dog On Linoleum,” he details his early life in Eastern Tennessee and elsewhere in the South. 

In “My Trip Down The Pink Carpet,” Leslie comically weaves anecdotes from his early life with his adventures in Hollywood in the eighties and nineties.  Having seen his first show in Atlanta, where the khaki-and-Lacoste crowd went absolutely wild, I wondered how last night’s New York suit-and-tie audience would react.  Amazingly, they went just as crazy for this short sober man as the folks had in Atlanta, proving Leslie’s near-universal appeal. 

As popular as “Dog on Linoleum” was in certain parts of the country, judging from last night, ”Pink Carpet,” with its stories about the young unknown George Clooney, Mark Harmon, “Dorothy” Faye Dunaway, Rue McClanahan, Beverly D’Angelo, Marlee Matlin and many others will appeal to audiences everywhere.  Is Boy George a saint or pure evil?  Go to the show to find out.  More importantly, the show ends with the culmination of Leslie’s decades-long journey from self-loathing to self-acceptance, a message many people will find hopeful. 

Last night was only the third performance of his show and it was spectacular.  His tour resumes in a month and as of now, there are twenty-nine stops listed May - August.  Check his website here and go see this show!

The LGBT television show “Under The Pink Carpet” was there and soon they’ll have a report on it, so watch it if it’s on in your area, or check their website for a streaming video of the event.

To anyone who says there are no gay heroes or role models, I say there plenty, just open your eyes and see what Leslie is doing.  And hear his message. 

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 Last night’s New York performance wasn’t just about Leslie (okay, it was).  He cleverly inserted at the end that he worked for free, as all of the proceeds benefited the Harvey Milk School, where students can go and feel safe regardless of sexual orientation or other differences.  The show was produced by Bruce Robert Harris and Jack W. Batman, producers of GAYFEST NYC, new plays for our time.  Pictured here are interns for GAYFEST 2008, some of whom also graduated from the Harvey Milk School.  Another charity Leslie supports is The Trevor Project, a suicide prevention hotline established for gay and lesbian teens. Sadly, Leslie said that most of the calls are from the Bible Belt.

A nice surprise was the opener.  Playwright Brian Dykstra performed a ten-minute excerpt from his show, “The Jesus Factor.”  For someone who didn’t grow up steeped in fundamentalist dogma, Brian fully grasps its many flaws and inconsistencies.  I look forward to seeing the whole show. 

The show’s only drawback is the technical choreography.  As endearing as it is to watch the hyperactive Leslie fidget with the velvet ropes and toss the pink carpet, it becomes a distraction from his sharp humor and powerful story.  No doubt in the next month, Justin Timberlake’s dance coach will help him fix this one minor shortcoming.  After all, he says he paid her $500. 

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NOW, as if a tour weren’t enough, here’s the best part… June 3, Simon Spotlight (of Simon & Shuster) is publishing Leslie’s book!!!! My Trip Down The Pink Carpet is the title (go figure, what BRILLIANT marketing!) Most readers of this blog are avid book readers too, so this will be a real treat. I’ll post a review of it here so check back.

If you want to connect with Leslie, send him a friend request on his MySpace page. 

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FINALLY.  Many of us also know Leslie from his role as the Tammy Wynette “Tribute artist” in Del Shore’s “Sordid Lives.”  Well…”Sordid Lives” is coming to the small screen, in the form of a television series!! It premieres on the Logo Channel July 23.  I wish I could freeze myself into a deep sleep until then because I WANT TO SEE IT NOW!!!!  Because that’s not an option, I’ll have to settle for the trailer, which I’ve embedded below (although you’ll have to watch that soon because I’m sure YouTube will take it down for copyright violations, you can click here to go to AfterElton.com and watch it:

 

 

 

2008 Book Tour Concludes

Actually I’m going to follow the lead of our divas Cher and Barbara and have a few more farewell tours later this year (if you have to ask “Barbara who,” shouldn’t you be watching the NCAA finals?).  In May I’ll be in New Orleans and DC and it’s looking like June in San Francisco, but for now, it’s over. 

Having just returned from 20 cities in 3 months (including Atlanta with my favorite bookstore owner, Philip Rafshoon, in the picture on the left), I need a break.  First, to catch up with emails - my apologies to readers who’ve kindly emailed me since December.  And the day job.  Yuck.  But most of all to spend time with Jonathan, the king of patience (at least with me).  Oh yeah, and to get back to writing. 

Sunday Jonathan asked me “Was it worth it?”  Financially?  It wouldn’t take an MBA to say absolutely not.  Although several friends were EXTREMELY generous by hosting dinners and lunches, promoting events and donating cash to help defray costs, I’ve still spent far more of my own money on my books than I’ll ever make from them (barring that much-desired call from Oprah…or Spielberg).  A few A-list writers are fortunate enough to have bottom-line driven publishing companies pay for their tours but for most of us, it doesn’t make sense from a business perspective.  So if we want to get off the island (of Manhattan), it’s out of our own pocket.

But was it worth it?  Absolutely yes.  As Jesus said:

Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal.  But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.

Why is it worth it?  One reason in many: The people I’ve met along this journey. 

- Charlie, who has told hundreds about my books and brought many to the reading in Atlanta (which he drove two hours to get there), then for coming to the Greenville reading the next day where he listened to the same sections again. Oh and bringing folks to that reading as well.  He’s definitely an evangelist.

- Terry, for his amazing generosity over the last couple of months. 

- Tony and his partner, for treating me to dinner in Nashville.

- “Elton” John Sheffield, for introducing me in Atlanta, for housing me and for travelling a parallel journey with me for over twenty-five years.

- Dannie Scott.  Talk about parallel lives.  I’ve lost count of the eerie similarities in our lives.  I’m glad we connected and thanks for driving up from the coast. 

- To Dennis who drove two hours to be at the reading in Raleigh.  It’s cool to have 100 people at a reading in Manhattan, but when 15-20 people attend a reading where the average drive was an hour (meaning some have come from much further)… wow, that makes me teary-eyed with appreciation. 

- For Robert, when he said it was an honor to meet me.  For someone like me, who grew up feeling a universe of guilt for being born with original sin, hearing someone say it’s an honor to meet me is a humbling, and gratifying, experience. 

- My junior high school girlfriend, Melissa, and her girlfriend, Jen, for driving down the mountain to Charlotte.

- For Dawn.  Too many reasons to list.  And to Carolyn.  The same, but this time to her boyfriend for venturing into The White Rabbit past dildos and pretty explicit gay porn pics to listen to me read. 

- Megan.  For being an example of strength, for helping me see the goodness in the world. 

- Bill and James - what a fantastic dinner, for introducing me to all your wonderful friends in my hometown. 

- For everyone in my Yahoo group who posted a wonderful comment on Friday in response to the painful day I was having. 

There are so many others, these are the few who pop into my mind from the last week.  I wish I’d had time to take pictures but I’d need to clone myself for that.  And I’m pretty sure congress passed a specific law banning me from cloning me.  However, there are a lot of pictures from Atlanta.  Click here to see them.

Check back.  I’ll be blogging less as I get back to writing more.

View Discussion with Christopher Rice in New York

MARCH 25, 2008 - Tribeca Barnes and Noble

After weeks of corresponding with Christopher Rice about our adventures in the world of gay Marine fiction, I was finally able to meet this engaging, personable charming young man at his book reading discussion and signing in Manhattan’s Tribeca area. (Watch the video below and you’ll learn why “reading” is crossed out.)

I posted a review of Rice’s new novel, Blind Fall, a few weeks ago; check it out along with some cute pics and article links.

Because YouTube has a 100mb size limitation, I divided Rice’s 32 minute Q&A about the novel into 5 parts. The first is embedded below and the other 4 have descriptions and links.

PART ONE: Find out what topic Christopher Rice will not talk about! Why is the gay Marine issue so important to him? How did he become a novelist?

An exceptionally compelling quote:

I wanted to write an entertaining, suspenseful thriller that addressed the issue of gay Marines and gays in the military without condescending to people and without preaching…

By that standard (or any other) Blind Fall is a huge success!

PART TWO: Click here to see Rice describe how the book Generation Kill by Evan Wright, a journalist embedded with a Force Recon Marine unit, influenced him.

The Marines Rice met in Palm Springs were some of the Marines in Wright’s book. Read about what happened to these Marines:

Wright encounters members of the battalion from all ranks, but the “main players” can be narrowed down to just six from Bravo Company: Sergeant Brad Colbert, Corporal Harold James Trombley, Sergeant Rudy Reyes, Lieutenant Nathaniel Fick, Sergeant Antonio Espera and Corporal Josh Ray Person.

Rice also begins taking questions from the crowd at Barnes and Noble. Find out who his favorite character is from his four novels to date.

PART THREE:  Click here to learn the source of writer’s block for Christopher Rice?  How did the cover for Blind Fall come into being?

During my 8 years as an active duty gay Marine, I thought I’d observed every similarity between gay men and Marines.  Leave it to a civilian 10 years my junior to teach me another.   According to Rice, “Marines view mainstream society as weak” and Marines exist to stengthen and balance this deficiency.  Likewise, “gay men view society as barren and plain and in need of culture and beauty.”  We (Marines and gay men) see ourselves as “men apart.”   

PART FOUR:  Click here to find out about Rice’s meeting with Navy SEALs.  Also learn his thoughts on writing a novel about post-Katrina New Orleans.  And why hasn’t he written a sequel to his previous novels?  Have any Marines commented about Blind Fall?  

The most frightening part of the discussion was learning that people posted death threats on Rice’s YouTube video where he discussed the novel standing in front of the Palm Springs windmills that adorn the cover.  I’m glad that Rice made a point to correct his statement that a straight Marine had posted the comment.  While possible, my guess is that only a Marine “wanna-be” would post something like this.  Real Marines understand the severity of death and while they might not agree with the subject of Blind Fall, they’re also taught to respect freedom, including freedom of speech.  After all, it’s what Marines risk their lives to protect.  Then again, maybe my memories are becoming fonder the further away I am from my time of service. 

PART FIVE: See the conclusion of Rice’s Question and Answer session.  Unfortunately, the final questions were the de rigueur (1) do you base your fiction on real people and (2) what about a movie version.  I must be becoming a jaded old writing queen because my reaction is:  BARF!  I HATE these questions for reasons I won’t go into here.  However, watch the video because although he’s undoubtedly had these inane queries hundreds of times, Rice answers them with a grace and enthusiasm I find impossible to muster. 

See a professional interview with Christopher with Josh & Josh on Towleroad.com video. 

To learn more about Christopher Rice, visit his website: christopherricebooks.com.  He’s still touring so see if he’s coming to your town and attend a reading in person.

Photo credits:  Josh McNey (top) and Michael Childers (center)

2008 Tour ends where the story begins…

It’s been great!  Thanks for your support this year.  Code of Conduct is doing well, thanks to you who’ve read it and recommended it to your friends. 

There’s one final leg of the book tour left and it’s in my favorite region of the country: the Southeast.  We planned it this way because (1) I love the South especially in the spring and (2) I wanted to end it on a good note, a guarantee in Georgia, Tennessee and the Carolinas. 

Here’s the schedule:

Wednesday, March 26 @ 7:00 - NASHVILLE, TN:
OutLoud Books and Store
1703 Church Street
Nashville, TN 37203
(615) 340-0034
Click here for map

Thursday, March 27 @ 8:00 - ATLANTA, GA:
Outwrite Books and Coffeehouse
991 Piedmont Avenue (@ 10th St.)
Atlanta, GA 30309
(404) 607-0082
Click here for map

Friday, March 28 @ 6:00 - GREENVILLE, SC:
The Open Book
110 South Pleasantburg Drive (@ Antrim / Laurens Road)
Greenville, SC 29607
(864) 235-9651
Click here for map

Saturday, March 29 @ 3:00 - RALEIGH, NC:
White Rabbit Raleigh
309 West Martin Street
Raleigh, NC 27601
(919) 856-1429
Click here for map

Sunday, March 30 @ 3:00 - CHARLOTTE, NC:
White Rabbit Charlotte
920 Central Avenue
Charlotte, NC 28204
(704) 377-4067
Click here for map

Hope to see you at one or more of these events. Please tell your friends in these areas.

After Elton Raves About CODE of CONDUCT

“CODE OF CONDUCT by Rich Merritt (456 page paperback; $15) is a good fictional follow-up to the non-fiction Secrets of a Gay Marine Porn Star. Admittedly, Merritt’s first novel is a bit of a disappointment following his autobiography, a good example of truth sometimes being more exciting than fiction.

However, standing on its own merits, Code of Conduct is a fascinating, ambitious, exciting novel telling a story that Hollywood bigwigs would surely make into an epic drama – if it weren’t about gay people.

Merritt puts his experience in the U.S. Marines to good use in this book, peppering the plot with details that only a veteran such as he would know. Thanks to Merritt, we learn about an underground society of lesbian and gay service members, who befriend and support one another while maintaining a straight facade to the unforgiving military establishment.

Code of Conduct takes place in the hopeful days of 1993, when newly inaugurated President Bill Clinton promised to abolish the antigay provisions of the military’s Code of Conduct. (And we all know how that one ended.)

While the plot centers on a tragic love story between two Marines – Gunnery Sgt. Don Hawkins and First Lt. Patrick McAbe, a helicopter pilot – Code of Conduct has more characters and situations than one can mention in a brief review. Closeted colonels, repressed Investigative Service agents, homophobic politicians and unscrupulous reporters clash with uniformed men and women who just want to live their lives while serving their country. The result is an exciting read that never lets down, even when we know what’s going to happen next.”

AfterElton also raves about two other Kensington Books.  Check it out here.

Scott Heim Appears

Tuesday, March 11:  Author Scott Heim appeared at the Barnes and Noble in the Chelsea area of New York City to read from his new novel We Disappear. I’ve attended dozens of book readings around Manhattan in the two years I’ve been here; this was (by far) the largest crowd for a gay author. (oops, take that back - I attended Jeffrey Toobin’s reading and he appeared with Anderson Cooper.) So, to rephrase, this was the largest reading by an OPENLY gay author. And it was easy to see why Scott is so popular (besides his excellent writing skills). He’s really cute and the way he kept rubbing his freshly-buzzed hair was so endearing, I wanted to run up there and rub it too. More than one guy did at the signing part of the event, sort of the way people feel like they can go up to a pregnant woman and rub her belly.

You may recall Scott from his previous books Mysterious Skin and In Awe as well as the movie adaptation of Mysterious Skin. During one of my earliest visits to New York several years ago I saw this movie at the Quad. It was fantastic. One of those movies that stays in the front of your head for a long time.  It’s dark, but so real, in the way that comes alive. 

Admittedly I haven’t had a chance to read We Disappear yet, but I’m taking it with me on a trip this weekend.  But here’s a rave review by Sarah Weinman of the Los Angeles Times:

“[S]uspenseful….Clearly, this is a writer well acquainted with darkness…. We Disappear ventures down a twitchy, discomfiting path, with small disturbances blowing up into larger ones, like a film camera zooming in for a high-definition close-up…. We Disappear is more honest, and thus more troubling, for it reflects the stark knowledge that truth is only an amalgam of experience, a collection of individual shards that don’t coalesce into a pleasing whole. As Heim suggests, the search for truth invites the Hansels and Gretels of the world to follow the wrong adult home, the Alices to peer down the rabbit hole—and fantasy to cover up the nasty grime of reality.”

Below is a video recording of Scott’s reading. 

Sadly, this was the final book reading at the Chelsea Barnes and Noble because the store is closing on March 31. You know it’s bad when even a mega-chain behemoth like B&N refuses to pay the exorbitant rent this town demands.  But they couldn’t have picked a more compelling guy for their swan song. 

Here’s Part One: 

Because YouTube limits videos to 100MB or 10 minutes, the event is in seven parts:

Part Two:  The missing children

Part Three:  ”Scott’s” mother’s obsession with missing children:  Where does it come from?

Part Four: “We believe she’s out there somewhere,” he was saying.  “Probably being held against her will.”

Part Five: Scott concludes his reading and takes questions, beginning with “Do you have a special attraction to kidnapping?” 

Part Six: Find out what helped Scott break through his writer’s block.

Part Seven:  Actual memory vs. what we think we remember.

How to contact Scott: 
ScottHeim.com:  Check out the video trailer on his website.  It’s pretty eerie, in an everyday sort of way.  It’s happening all around us.  Or is it? And find out where Scott’s tour stops are, and his blog and other reviews he’s posted. 

MySpace and Facebook

Semper Fi, Christopher Rice

Today is a big day for author Christopher Rice.  Not only does he turn the ripe young age of 30, his novel Blind Fall is released.

Blind Fall is about one former Marine’s journey to accept his past, to understand his relationships with his Captain, who turns out to be gay, and his younger brother who recently committed suicide. 

Here is my review:

“Few writers can compel a reader forward as breathlessly as Christopher Rice, while along the way showing (through the characters’ actions) a principle or statement about society. Often either the action suffers from didacticism or the message is lost in the action. Not here - action and meaning work seamlessly together in a rich tale.

The main character is driven by a sense of loyalty - sometimes recklessly - but he also suffers from problems that are epidemic in American culture: Homophobia and an ideal of hypermasculinity that is ultimately unattainable; and beliefs that he must be a protector and that he owes penitence for his past failures in this regard. He must overcome these flaws and feelings of inadequacy and by the end he does, in a credible manner.

The relationships are also poignant. Love between men can be a brotherly platonic sort of love, the kind that allows them to survive in combat, or it can be a marital and sexual love that allows them to survive a lifetime together. Rice demonstrates both kinds of love and how men who feel one can come to understand the other. This is difficult territory in American literature and Rice is brave to tackle it, and he succeeds masterfully.”

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You’re probably familiar with Rice; he’s had three NY Times bestsellers and his mother is world-renowned for her books as well.  Both of these photos - Christopher looking very bad-boy-yet-vulnerable to the right, and the one below, with his mom, are absolutely adorable.  My plan to is videotape his book reading in Chelsea on March 25 and post it here on this blog in April.  He’s kindly given me permission to do that (although I’m not sure his publicist is aware of it, but hey, forgiveness is always easier than permission, just as Governor Spitzer, er, maybe that’s a bad example).

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“I instantly felt at home here. And it’s nice to be closer to him.”

By “him” she doesn’t mean a higher power but her only child, Christopher, 29, who smiles as he sips a Diet Coke at the end of the couch.

These are good times for the writing Rices. Although still sorely missing their patriarch — poet and painter Stan Rice died of a brain tumor in 2002, and his image and works line the house — mother and son are releasing new and wildly different novels.”

Click here to read the rest of the story from USA Today about this fabulous mother-son writing duo.

(The photo of Christoper Rice was taken by Michael Childers; photo to the right of Christopher and Anne Rice was taken byb Michael T. Larsen and Tracy Talbert for USA Today)

Are you a gay / lesbian spouse or partner of a Service Member?

If so, Out Magazine is looking for you for a photo portfolio. 

Contact me at richmerritt@richmerritt.com if you’re interested in participating or need more information.